Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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