when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize