all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
