Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
