I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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