Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
