is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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