I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
