Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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