I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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