Banned from zoo.
Again?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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