im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
