are you so shy because you have an std?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
