I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
