hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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