How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Never let your siblings swipe right.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
