I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
