The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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