nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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