everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
