last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
