State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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