Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
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