dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
