Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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