how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize