i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
