I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
please come you make the beer taste better
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
