We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
