remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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