maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
