I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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