dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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