Pregnant stripper...not hot.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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