It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
