im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
