I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
