super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
