I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
