Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
