I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
