I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Randomize
