fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
