Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
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