she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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