You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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