He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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