Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
