Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
