I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I don't think brook has ever known best
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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