do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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